The Bayou Bengals of LSU, a school that I'm a big fan of, announced on their sports page that Death Valley will now have purple turf. This is an absolute outrage. LSU is a major program in a major conference with a major coach and multiple national championships to their name. Why the fuck do you need to turn one of the most revered venues in all of sports into a sideshow attraction? Death Valley used to strike fear in the hearts of opposing teams. Now other teams just have shit talking ammunition. Let me quote Les Miles. A coach I used to respect about as much as someone could respect a college football coach. "It's now time to expand the traditions that surround our football program. LSU is going to take the lead in what we think will become the wave of the future and that's field turf in the colors of your school. The installation of the purple field turf will add to the excitement of a Saturday Night in Tiger Stadium and this team will enjoy the opportunity to play on what will be the finest surface in football." The wave of the future? Are you fucking serious? Yeah good luck getting that to catch on. What's next? Alabama turning their field red? Fuck no. Carolina installing a powder blue field? Nope. Maybe Virginia Tech will install a field where they alternate burgundy and orange every 5 yards. No way in hell. This is the worst idea in college football since the BCS. I give it two seasons at the most.
PS, while we're at it, let's really make things interesting at start making footballs with team colors.
April Fools!
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