Golf's Newest Fag

It seems like every young player who comes on tour dresses and lookers gayer than the last one. The new young gun, Rickie Fowler, is really raising the bar. He's all about those fucking train conductor hats, white belts, those Euro shoes that don't even look like golf shoes, and big belt buckles. These articles of clothing are looking more and more mainstream every week. It scares me. I've divided the blame for Fowler's gayness into 4 equal parts.

1. It's just the way he is.
2. Puma. Whoever let this Euro soccer company into golf should be put to death.
3. Liberal celebrity culture has leaked into golf. Thanks a lot Justin Timberlake.
4. The media. They really get off to players dressing outlandish and queer. They constantly show guys like Ian Poulter and Camillo Villegas, and they always have to comment on what they're wearing. Golf doesn't come on E! We don't need "fashion correspondent" Marty Hackel in the booth every week describing the players outfits and telling us what's "hot" right now.

Golf used to be a sport played in ties and button-downs, not in mock turtleneck t-shirts, tight lime green pants, and white belts with buckles the size of my fist. I miss the 80s and 90s when guys wore khakis, collared shirts, and visors.


PS, despite his gayness, Rickie Fowler fucking rips it. I can't take that away from him.