Fuck You Mark Schlereth

This may appear unprovoked, but when I his big fucking head on TV grinning like he's smarter, tougher, and better looking than everyone, I just can't help myself. Just because you've had 20 knee surgeries (I didn't even have to look that up because he says it like every day) doesn't mean you're tough. It means you're stupid for being a 245 pound guard in the NFL. Get off ESPN and go back to playing Detective Roc Hoover on Guiding Light. Oh wait, it got canceled. I've never watched a Soap Opera before, but if a TV show is on for like 60 years then a big, roided, arrogant fuck joins the cast and it gets canceled, I know where I'd point my finger.


PS, check out his official website. Legit

If I Hear "Who Dat?" One More Time...

Yeah it's kinda cool I guess, but not when every single person in the United States of America says it more than on the reg. People say it fucking constantly. ESPN jumped all over that shit like they coined it and all hell broke lose. Newsflash: when the same two words are said over and over and over and over, they get old. But whatever I'll just start belting out "Hail to the Redskins" all over the fucking place. Who Dat gon stop me?

PS, Who Dat hanging that fucking bald eagle? I didn't know Rey Mysterio was an America hating French Saints fan




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Athlete of the Day---Marvin Harrison

Marvin Harrison is one of the greatest wider receivers in the history of football. He owns or shares over 30 NFL records. He was the golden boy, "why can't other receivers act more like Marvin" type dude. Didn't celebrate or anything. He just went about his business. Maybe he was a good guy, or maybe he was just a cold blooded killer who didn't joke around about shit. I'd bet the house on the latter. He tried to kill some dude named Dwight Dixon outside of some garage that he owns. Dixon sued, but couldn't prove that Harrison was the shooter. I mean it was with Marvin's gun outside of a garage that he owned. Obviously this dude thought he got a bum deal. He probably brought his car in for a tire rotation and ended up with a new engine. Typical mechanic. Anyway Cold blooded killas don't like being sued for shooting at people. That's fucking embarrassing to them because it means they missed. They'd rather be put in the pen for life for killing rather than being sued for missing. So Dixon is obviously dead now but I'm sure you had figured that out halfway through reading this. Shot two blocks from Harrison's sports bar. He was just keepin it real. Where are you gonna be tonight Marvin?

Snowball Fight Turns Ugly When Drunk College Student Murders His Chin on a Rail

Battle wounds from the snowball fight of the century. I was trying to Peyton Manning someone in the head from deep when I suddenly lost my traction and fell chin first into the railing of the deck. Stunned but undaunted I got up, packed a snowball, poured beer on it, and fired. Missed.


PS, where the fuck is my face? I don't see any evidence that I have facial features. Obviously not professional photography.

Carolina Wins!

No I'm kidding, and them getting a quality win (not NC State) is starting to turn into a when pigs fly type of situation. The Heels now have an insulting 13-9 record (2-5 in the ACC) and are barreling towards .500. Roy's gonna need to dig into his vocab to find a way to criticize the team after saying last week, "How can you go any lower? Be honest, how can it be any worse than it is right now?" Let me introduce you to "lower." Yeah Virginia Tech is better than UVA and it was in Blacksburg, but seriously, how do you lose your next game after getting embarrassed at home by the Hoos? That just doesn't happen. Now they're gonna go to Maryland on Sunday and lose by double digits. Duke is coming up on Wednesday. I'll be there in my gameday shirt with hotel liquor bottles in my pockets. I sit above the UNC bench so they better hope they don't get blown out or I'm throwing a Smithfield BBQ sandwich at Deon Thompson's head. Then testing out the old arm with a chik fil a nugget at Dick Vitale's face.

Quote of the Day

"In Turkey, the media wait for you outside. You go down to them, in tunnel, and sometimes, people are yelling and throwing things. They throw coins. I get hit in the head. Bleeding. There is blood."

- Mehmet Okur


Yeah seems like a tough life for basketball players in Turkey.

Athlete of the Day---Antoine Walker

Antoine Walker was possibly the most annoying player to watch in NBA history. 6'9" slow unathletic power forward who avoided contact at all times. He shot 3 pointers like every time he got the ball. When asked why he shot so many 3s Walker responded, "Because they don't have 4 pointers." So you'd probably think he was like a Tom Beringer caliber sniper from deep right? Wrong. He was 32% for his career. Not bad enough to never shoot them, but definitely not good enough to take 7 per game. He was a career 41% shooter overall which is fucking miserable for a power forward. Possibly the worst all time actually.

Antoine played 13 seasons in the NBA and made tens of millions of dollars. He is somehow broke less than 2 years after he retired. I don't care who you are or what you buy. That is doing some work. I mean you have to be like the worst gambler in history to blow that kind of cash.

Dunleavy "Steps Down" as Clippers Head Coach

Okay so what I haven't mentioned about myself is that I am an enormous closet Clippers fan. They're the first NBA team I ever went to see. My family was in LA back in '99 or 2000 or something and my dad asked if I wanted to go to Lakers game to see Kobe and Shaq, or a Clippers vs. Blazers game. Much to the shagrin of my dad, I wanted to see Rasheed Wallace, Arvydas Sabonis and the Portland Trailblazers take on Lamar Odom, the Kandi Man Michael Olowokandi, and the LA Clippers. Maybe I ruined the vacation, maybe there not being a fucking Cheetah at the San Diego Zoo ruined it. I don't know I'm not a doctor. Anyway, I'm about the happiest Clippers fan in Virginia right now. Dunleavy has been ruining all star caliber talent his whole coaching career, and I was losing my mind watching him try to do it to Eric Gordon (my favorite player). The Clips couldn't completely rid the organization of the virus (he's still GM) but hopefully Baron Davis will stop pouting and start running an offense. Look for EG to average 25 points per game after the all star break.

Cavs go for 10 straight tonight vs. Dwade and the Heat

Dwayne Wade and the Heat venture to the "Q" tonight to take on the King and his court. The Cav's roll into this one riding a 9 game win streak, their longest of the season. The two matchups between the teams this year have been hard fought, intense games. Both Lebron James and DWade have lived up to their superstar billings, delivering spectacular games both times out. Last time the two teams met, DWade scored 30 in the first half, but James hitting the go ahead free throws in the final seconds to seal the win for the Cavs.

The Cavs limp into this matchup, playing without Mo Williams and Delonte West. Their absence hasn't affected the Cavs as they have won 9 straight and won their past 4 games by an average of 19 points. Damn. Daniel "Boobie" Gibson has been serviceable for the Cavs at the PG position, but we all know Lebron has been controlling the offense. Last game out against Memphis, he tied his career high with 15 dimes. Look for the Cavs to ride Lebron this game while counting on hustle plays from his supporting cast. Anderson Varejao, JJ Hickson, Jawad Williams, and the Shaqtus will have to play well for the Cavs to extend their win streak to 10 games.

The Heat have been struggling of late, dropping their last 3. Dwade has been spectacular as always, but he needs more from his supporting cast for the Heat to stand a chance. I think the Heat big men, Michael Beasley and Jermaine O'neal need to really elevate their play tonight to match the high energy frontmen for the Cavs. I don't think they have it in em.

The Cavs are basically the shit at home. Their something like 66-3 at home in the past two years. That is fucking unbelievable. After the Cavs managed to take both games from the Heat in Miami this year, I see no way the Heat thaw the Cavs hot streak tonight.

The line for the game is Cav's -9.5. Thats a little steep for my blood, but the Cav's take this one by 4.

Is Tiger Woods Still the Most Marketable Athlete?

ESPN

Of Course he is! I told myself I wouldn't get into this issue on here, but ESPN just posted the biggest no shit Sherlock article in recent history. His name is more popular than any world leader ever. I guarantee you would see him in ads on a different planet. His name as a brand is worth 82 million dollars...that's more than the next 5 athletes combined. David Beckham 20 mil, Federer 16 mil, Dale Jr. 14 mil, Bron 13, and Kobe 12. And he's a golfer. Shit blows my mind. Yeah it seems like he's killing his name right now being in hiding, but he has the best PR people money can buy working around the clock on his return. It's gonna be like the 2nd coming of Jesus.
He'll be back with a dream team list of sponsors and 1 million times the talent of any player on tour, so Ben Crane and Jesper Parnevik can quit bitching and go back to being like 4th tier PGA Tour pros.

Pic of the Day

Fuck you Phil Mickelson.

Quote of the Day

“This team is one execution away from being a very good basketball team.” –- Doc Rivers.



Better get on that Doc the Celtics need some help. I suggest you execute Glen "big baby" Davis (pictured below). Or maybe Kendrick Perkins. Executing either of them would make the Celtics a better team.

PS that ref needs to look out or he'll get executed. Its written all over Doc's face

Athlete of the Day---Thomas "Hollywood" Henderson

Hollywood Henderson was an outside linebacker for the Dallas Cowboys from 1975-79. Although he made a Pro Bowl, he will always be known for his drug and alcohol use on and off the field. Yeah, he did blow during games, so? It was the 70s. Drugs were like Gatorade to those guys back then. That wasn't the problem. He bottomed out in '83 when he was arrested for smoking crack with teenage girls in exchange for "consensual" sex. Odd considering he was also charged with assault in the ordeal. I blame the teenage girls personally. Classic case of trying to get money out of a professional athlete. Ya'll might want to make sure he has money to burn before you go ruining someone's life. He was just looking for a good time.

Well he's sober now, and has won the fucking lottery twice. His biggest jackpot was 28 mil. when asked what he does all day since he won, Hollywood replied "Not a damn thing, and I don't start that until after lunch." I mean seriously God? A dude who fucks and smokes crack with teenagers can win 28 million, and I can't win more than 20 bucks on a scratcher? At least let me win a hundo once. I would lose my mind in the middle of 7-11.

PS, can't you just imagine the joke he's telling in that picture?"Get it guys? orange CRUSH!" Look how uncomfortable that kid looks in the background. Classic "just walked into a locker room and everyone's naked" look.

Could the Old Portis be Back?

The Washington Post reports that Clinton Portis is optimistic about playing under his former coach Mike Shanahan.

My feelings about Clinton Portis have always been hot and cold. On one hand, he can be an ultra productive "factor back"(fuck you Merrill Hodge). He has or had the talent to be a 1500 yards per year RB, but he's only done it twice in his career with the Redskins. He actually rushed for 1500 yards in both seasons under Shanahan. I don't want to sound like the broken record that is Redskin optimism, but Portis could have a big year. Maybe not 1500 yards because I mean he's old and everything, but if he stays healthy I think he could go for 1000-1200 which would be huge.

Okay so here's the other hand...He's fucking weird, unruly, and is a self absorbed diva. He could be rollin and dominating defenses, then all of a sudden he'll disagree with a play or the coach sits him for a series or whatever, and he turns into the worst running back in the NFL. When he's pouting the line of scrimmage looks like its been boobie trapped with a wire because he literally trips over it. He can go for like 20 consecutive runs of 2 yards or less because, wouldn't you know, when he trips over the wire he gains his body length which is about 2 yards. I've seen him do it I'm not exaggerating.

Anyway, I really don't remember him all that much when he was with the Broncos because I refused to accept a Denver RB who wasn't Terrell Davis. All I know is he had over 1500 yards on 5.5 yards per carry both of those seasons. Hopefully Shanahan won't push his buttons so we can have a nice quiet productive season.


PS, I've said it once and I'll say it again...There's some weird connection between the Redskins and Wizards. I think about Gilbert coming from Golden State after two season and being a fucking weirdo.

PPS, no it wasn't Halloween...

Pic Of The Day

Not to much to say about this one, but the picture is just fucking funny and absurd. This Saudi Arabian little league beast is 6 foot 8 inches and 256 pounds, and he is "13 years old".....REALLY!?

Shaq Running the Break

Proof of Tiny's point that Shaq probably didn't make a play in transition (sorry about the bad quality)

Quote of the Day

"Don't say I don't get along with my teammates. I just don't get along with some of the guys on the team."

- Terrell Owens

You have to try to say something that stupid.

Window Washing 101

Watching blocks like this will never get old for me. This has to be demoralizing as shit. OJ and the Grizz are already down 20 to the Cavs and OJ thinks he's about to get an easy bucket to pad his stats, then... BOOM! As you'll see in the video OJ is stepping inside the 3 point line when Bron crosses half court and he still manages to smack it off the backboard harder than you would hit a red headed step child. When are people in the NBA going to learn that the glass is closed for cleaning during transition. Take it up for the jam or don't even try.

PS- The ball flys off the backboard and ends up at halfcourt in Shaq's old ass hands. What are the odds he makes the bucket on that breakaway? I'd say slim to none.

Athlete of the Day---James "Boobie" Miles

Boobie Miles was an unbelievably dominant running back for the Permian Panthers whos career was cut short by a torn ACL and subsequent bad decision making during recovery. He just wouldn't believe that fucking doctor because he was from Midland, and Boobie intuitively thought that the doctor was just trying to keep him off the field so Permian wouldn't win. That's how fucking crazy Texas High School football is. In the movie the doctor was just trying to help, but in reality, I guarantee you sabotage like that goes on all the fucking time. It's all about getting that ring because the town literally lives and dies by the high school football team's successes and failures.

In the movie Friday Night Lights Boobie has some ridiculous lines. From "Ya'll wanna win, put Boobie in" to "God made black beautiful. God made Boobie beautiful. And when I knock someone out, I'm gonna knock 'em out in black nikes and I'm gonna smile while I do it" to " Yo, Mike. You gonna come visit my distinguished ass out in California?" His swag was unreal. So Boobie Miles still lives in Odessa (shocker) and has apparently let himself go (another shocker) and is trying to pursue a rap career. Go figure...


PS, he's the guy on the left

Athlete of the Day---Larry Bird

I can't think of a more non-dominating dominant force in the history of basketball than Larry "Basketball Jesus" Bird. He was just an awkwardly tall geek who was somehow coordinated as fuck. His jumper looked like it came out of a 1940s basketball fundamentals video. Larry Legend posted the most insane stat lines since Wilt the Stilt was in his prime. The thing about the Stilt is that the average height of a basketball player in the 50s and 60s was like 5'8" and he was 7'1". Bird's career averages are 24.3 points 10 rebounds 6.3 assists 1.7 steals shooting 50% from the floor almost 90% from the charity stripe and almost 40% from the land of plenty. I would argue that if he wasn't such a big and insultingly nonathletic white guy, he could be the greatest player in the history of the game. I just wish they had combine measurements from when he was coming out of college.

PS, check out the video. His shot reminds me so much of this time when I played my grandpa in horse except my grandpa didn't bring the fucking rain

Tonight Can't Miss Premiere

The Mike Vick Project. BET's new reality series will focus on Mike Vick and his tumultuous road back to the NFL. The show will also focus on his troubled child and the fallout from his legal troubles.

I would rather spend the whole night strapped to a chair while being forced to listen to fingernails being dragged across a chalkboard than watch this. I mean, is this really necessary Mike? We all know you're only sorry because you got caught. If you hadn't, you'd still be as Bad Newz as ever, fighting and killing dogs, wasting your money on retarded investments, and bailing your moronic brother out of jail for getting DUI's with 15 year old girls. Having an 8-episode miniseries isn't going to get you out of bankruptcy court either, Mike.

The show's examination of his childhood is just some lame attempt to justify why it was in his nature to commit crimes. You were given an opportunity to do something everyone in this country dreams about, and you did it well. You were paid too well. All this and you can't shake your idiot friends from home? They can't be that cool. You should have just bought new friends. Tons of athletes have been able to free themselves from the neighborhood and go on to be successful, respectable members of society. Apparently, you missed the boat.
By the way, Mike came out today and said that he wants to be a starter next year and that he believes he is a top-10 quarterback in the league right now. Wow, I didn't know he was this stupid. Mike was barely top-10 before he got caught killing pups.

If You're into Getting Rich

So I just got off the phone with God, and I got the scoop on what's going down tonight in college basketball. First you take Kentucky -11 at home versus Ole Miss. John Wall now has a chip on his shoulder which is horrible news for the Rebels. I'm guessing Wall will end the game with 25 points 8 assists 4 steals and 3 broken Rebel ankles as a stat line. Demarcus Cousins has an irremovable chip on his shoulder that he should probably get checked out. His stat line will probably be 18 points 13 rebs and 3 Calipari benchings for temper tantrums, and 2 elbows thrown. Rebel bodies, jock straps, and egos will be left on the floor for the janitor to clean up.

Next, you take Michigan +2 over Northwestern. I don't know a whole lot about this matchup other than the fact that Beilein will whip that team into shape eventually and you just can't pass up a spread like that against Northwestern.

Finally, for a night cap you take #9 BYU -19 at home against TCU. This is where we separate the men from the boys. Hopefully you'll have some liquor courage in you because take a -19 spread sober can be tough, but trust me on this one. BYU doesn't just win at home. They bone teams so hard that they all leave Provo as newly converted Mormons.

Quote of the Day

"Me shooting 40% at the foul line it's just God's way to say nobody's perfect" -Shaq


Another amazing Shaq quote.

IDIUT of the Week---Tim Tebow

The IDIUT of the week this week is the golden boy himself Tim Tebow. I have always defended Tebow when everyone makes fun of him. I think I've done this because of my love for Tyler Hansbrough. I mean how can someone be criticized for effort? Tebow's actions this past week have changed my opinion of him. First, it's announced that he'll be doing a pro-life commercial during the Superbowl. I'm not saying I don't agree with his stance I don't want to get into that. But dude, Tim, how bout you make an NFL roster before you start doing bold politically charged commercials. This isn't Florida anymore. I mean leave Superbowl commercials to the football playing horses and the Miller High life guy. People get drunk while they watch the Superbowl, you can't have everyone laughing and high fiving and getting tanked then all of a sudden your feminine ass voice comes on the TV talking about abortion. Its beyond a buzz kill. Plus what if a some dude is hittin on a girl. Queue the awkward silence.

By the way, great job murdering your draft stock at the Senior Bowl workouts and game. I know you cried yourself to sleep every night after Todd McShay was done fucking your abilities on Sportscenter. I can't wait for the combine when people see that you're slow at shit. You can't mask your absence of athleticism with your size in the pros. God Bless

Gilbert Arenas cares about DC youth?

Why do athletes have to be full of so much shit all the time? I wish there were more pro's like Rex Ryan who just said whatever they felt all the time and didn't worry about PC bullshit or toeing the company line all the time. Following his recent gun troubles and recent guilty plea, Gilbert "wrote" a story for the Washington Post today that was centered around the efforts he's going to take to rebuild his relationship with D.C. youth. I quote,
"Guns and violence are serious problems, not joking matters -- a lesson that's been brought home to me over the past few weeks. I thought about this when I pleaded guilty as charged in court and when I accepted my NBA suspension without challenge."

I have a problem reading just the first line. I present to the court the first piece of evidence that indicates that Mr. Arenas thinks guns are a joking matter:

(Taken the night before he was suspended indefinitely, how stupid do you have to be to do this?)

Gilbert is only apologizing and trying to reshape his image because he doesn't want the Wizards to find someway to opt of his moronic $100 contract. Gilbert didn't take this thing seriously from the start and now he's getting buttfucked by it. He's sacrificing over $7 million in salary for the rest of the games he'll miss this season, and if the Wizards are able to get out of that contract, he won't find any team willing to give him anything higher than a vet minimum, which would annually pay him about what he makes for 10 games now.

Also, Gilbert, how did you just now realize that guns are not a joking matter? You play in Washington D.C., a city that used to hold the title as the murder capital of the U.S. and still ranks in the top 10 every year, AND you live 45 miles away from Baltimore, a city so riddled with gun violence, that they average close to a murder a day.

Gilbert, I would respect you a lot more if you just came out and admitted that you really didn't give a fuck. Do you honestly expect anyone to believe anything you do from here on out is sincere? Do us all a favor and tell the truth, all you care about is you and as long as "your pockets straight" you don't give a fuck. Gilbert, just be you baby, don't hide behind this bullshit. I mean, maybe you were "sincere" before about charity, but now every time you go to some school in SE D.C. and read a speech someone else wrote about how bad guns are and how they negatively impacted your life, its going to look like this.

Rex-Rated

This picture was taken of Jets coach Rex Ryan during the Super Bowl mania in Miami. The T-Rex was spotted at a Mixed Martial Arts event talking shit to a local Dolphins fan. I applaud Rex for the confidence he had in his team this past season, his beating of the Chargers and their babyback bitch QB Philip Rivers, and being absolutely shithoused in this picture.

However, Rex gets zero points in my book for having the same chompers as Gary Busey

Lebron to the Wizards?

So rumors have been circulating about the Wizards trying to clear cap space to sign Lebron James this summer, and he might actually be interested. Lebron has also been linked to the Knicks and the Nets, and after watching him sit courtside at the Kentucky Vandy game, I am 100% certain that he will go to the team that gets the #1 draft pick. He's building a relationship with John Wall and calling it just being interested in a young talent. What a front. He just wants to sign with the NBA's worst team who will draft Wall and win a championship that year. Think about it. It would be the story of the century, and having that in his repertoire of accomplishments would give him something that Jordan and Kobe don't have and will never have. He's realizing that his title as a savior in Cleveland is fading because he still hasn't won a championship. Time to move on the the next town Bron.

Back to the possibility of the Wizards signing him. At first I was on board because we're struggling so much and need a change, but actually seeing someone more credible than me (Bill Simmons) write about it, I have had a change of heart. I hate Lebron James. I hate everything about the way he carries himself on and off the court. I'm not gonna lie and say I haven't gone OHHH after some of his dunks, but that's just an uncontrollable reflex I have when people dunk the fuck out of the ball. It doesn't know who dunked it. Anyway, I just can't look past his history of Wizard bashing. I don't know how some teams (yankees) do it and still sleep at night. It'd be like Carolina firing Roy and signing Coach K. That's an exaggeration considering it would probably lead to the Apocalypse, but its a similar situation. If I'm completely wrong about it all being about who gets Wall, then Bron has a tough choice to make. Does he want to live the superstar life in New York City, join his amigo Jay-Z's empire in New Jersey, lib out with Obama in DC, or try to start a movie career in LA (it's bound to happen sooner or later)? I can only speculate what might be going on in that arrogant head of yours Lebron.

PS, sorry Tiny

PPS, how fucking strong is Roger Mason? Bron either looks like he got shot or is about to fall to his knees, cry and be like WHY GOD WHYYY

Quote of the Day

"I'm not tryin to get into any Cheerios commercials, or Coca Cola commercials. I want to do a commercial in the hood."- Ron Artest

hahahaha. Ron Artest is so fucking weird. Cheerios? What a random company. When was the last time you saw an athlete in a Cheerios commercial? Its always little kids or middle aged people trying to watch their cholesterol.

How bout them Heels!

How fucking ugly has this season gotten? A 15 point loss at home against UVA is a disgrace to the old blue and white. I bet even Dean Smith left early to beat the traffic. I was discussing the Tar Heels recent issues (to put it lightly) with some folks at lunch and have come up with one single person to point my furious finger at. Larry Drew. It's all on you dude. All I need is 5 seconds of face time with him to tell him once simple thing. YOU'RE NOT TY LAWSON! That's all I would need to say to him and Carolina would make a respectable tournament run. I'm so sick of watching him try to push the tempo, split traps, penetrate, or do anything that Ty Lawson could do. Seriously have you ever seen a division 1 point guard pick up his dribble in the corner as much as Larry does? Its like the moment he sees pressure he just runs to the corner, picks the ball up, and prays that Roy will call a timeout. Ever since John Wall and Eric Bledsoe unmasked this monster of a weakness, we've struggled to get wins. I enjoyed Carolina basketball more in 02 when we went 8-20 because they were so bad they had the underdog tag. I would have fought someone to the death for anyone on that team except Melvin Scott. I'll be honest, I watched Superbad and the Grammys for the majority of the time the game was on last night, and I've watched Superbad on FX like 3 times in the last 4 nights.

Anyway, I'm basically deaf to criticism now. People come up to me all day and say stuff like "Carolina played sweet last night haha" and I'm just like "yeah they're pretty bad." End of conversation. It isn't worth getting work up over anymore because I know I'll be the one laughing next year when Harrison Barnes, the next MJ (yeah I'm calling it), and Reggie Bullock come to Chapel Hill. Hopefully John Henson can break the 2 hundo pound mark by then because I think he's special.

Athlete of the Day----David Simms

Are there any movie characters more badass than the classic 90s golf villain? Yeah Shooter McGavin was sweet and all that, but he can't touch David Simms. Personally I don't really understand what he did to be considered the bad guy (besides hating women children and dogs). He runs shit on the course and dresses sweet. If there was a book on how to dress arrogant and badass (yeah you can do that) Simms wrote it. People seem to overlook the fact that if you want to be awesome at golf you have to walk around like you own the fucking place. Everyone made a big deal about him firing Cup after after he smoked that 3 wood onto the green, but I mean what self respecting pro golfer would let their caddie show them up at a charity event? Also what sort of rude old people bring their grandchild beyond the designated autograph place to try to steal a cheap signature. He was just trying to enjoy a post-round cig and had already fulfilled his autograph duties. Plus he doesn't go to that old guys job asking for his autograph.

PS, that 7 iron he hit is "still goin"